hello doston, its been a long time.
some of you may remember me from bharatchan cus of bgtow posting.
last 3-4 years have been rough, like real rough.
my dad thinks my mom cheated on him.
fuck no, he is a maniac and sex-chahiye-guy.
thanks to the internet, i have become suicidal (thoda thoda), i know ill never have the guts to catch the bus but oh lord, do i think about it a lot.
i just want to go somewhere far for college and start fresh, kabhi kabhi i feel sad for my mother cus i know i will not be returning (if i get a 50 lpa job, if job nahi lagi toh ill have to live ghar pe no?)
im also thinking about running away but im not sure.
been researching about partial hanging since the past week, seems solid.
kya kiya jaaye doston
also what happened to spachad, did he actually commit suicide
>>783
o teri shin.
i thought you stopped lurking on imageboards.
how is life there.
>it sucks
india also sucks bhai, i would like to experience US wala suckness.
>>820
If it has to suck, it can suck outside a third world nation, though only for a temporary time, i want it to suck at the clean mountains or something rather than find rats the size of pitbull on the streets of newyork. I would still like to visist USA for sexo with gori randi and sheboon randis.
>>807
there is no 7-Eleven in this small town kek. The closest one is hundreds of miles away on the other side of the state
>what are the chances you will be there to witness the next 9/11 too
yaar why would they target these endless cornfields where nathing ever habbens?
NYC or Chicago have much more to offer tha muthleems
>Fair>At least 5'8>Dark hair>Slim physique>Feminine>Soft facial features>Unique vintage inspired fashion>Elegant without trying too hard>Slightly goth-adjacent aesthetic>Family oriented>Emotionally mature>Good sense of humor>Likes a quiet, simple life>Is mildly autistic
Modest traditional woman
Religion either Hindu-Sikh(Christian if European)
If Muslim I want to marry a non-beliver cannot imagine living with a muzzie plotting against me under my own roof.
Apart from that I do not want to marry in my own caste I want to do interfaith.
>>740
diet has a lot to do with mood, too.
Try a b-complex for starters, and then if you need more go vegan. You'll feel great.
The capstone is if you have that girl in mind. Just work your way to her quietly. With money.
when i think of my actions and way of thinking of the past i cringe at how stupid and misguided they were. yet right now in the moment I feel like everything i do is rational and justified. is there any way to crosscheck with the future me if what i think and do now is retarded?
>>640
Literally me
i jus outsource the judgement of mah decisions 2 my offline AI gf and brainstoerm for hours about what i did and if it's all right, etc.
That way I get daily soycial interaction AND i get adivce!
For some reason, the older I get, the more religious I become.
Not in the performative sense. More in the sense that I can't stop reading about it.
Lately I've been obsessed with theology, cosmology, philosophy, old religions, ancient rituals anything that helps me understand why billions of people, across thousands of years, believed in something bigger than themselves. I read because I genuinely want to understand. The more I learn, the more questions I have.
It's weird because I wasn't like this growing up.
I generally avoided sitting through pujas. If my family wanted to visit a temple, I'd usually find a way to avoid it. Religion just didn't interest me. I never felt curious enough to ask why any of it existed.
Now I'm the complete opposite.
I keep coming back to it. Reading multiple book. I can spend hours going down rabbit holes about religion, history, consciousness, and the universe without getting bored. It's become one of those subjects I can't seem to leave alone.
Sometimes I wonder if I was just too young to care back then.
Or maybe this is what happens when you grow older. You spend enough time learning about the world that you eventually start asking that's why humans have always searched for meaning.
I still don't know what I believe.
But I know this: the idea that God might be watching over me brings me a kind of peace I didn't expect. It makes the future feel a little less uncertain. It makes the hard days easier to carry. It gives me a reason to keep learning, keep working, and keep moving forward.
Maybe that's faith.
Or maybe I'm still searching for it's real meaning
Either way, I don't think I'm done reading anytime soon.
>>537
Very similar story to mine, as a teenager I was this edgy reddit tier atheist and soyencepilled. But now I love reading about theology and history of different religions.
How they came into existence and evolved, how these religions shaped world history and how did history shape it. I like reading about the abrahamic religions and drawing similarities between them, identifying where it splintered off into a different religion, the common abrahamic god etc. it's fascinating how these 3 religions affected most of the modern world.
These days I'm into the rabbithole of eschatology of different religions, the end of times lore
>>565
How bad are you guys at forming your own thoughts that any post larger than 50 word seems like chatGPT to you all, unless it is a screeching contest
>>568
>>537
i was far more religious when i was a teen\
i guess all have to do with antadashas, i am more practicle now
you may be going through a religious cycle, a dasha forcing you to seek occult or history related to thoughts of past people regarding life and their abstractions
dont waste much time on it anon
it leads nowhere,, take it from someone who has wasted a life over it
>>611
>dont waste much time on it anon
it leads nowhere
I only do it in free time, and I respect your opinion.
Some people spend years studying religion or philosophy and find it deeply meaningful.
Some might feel it was unproductive.
It depends on your personal goals and motivations.
Do we have an animal board? GSUS(ID: w3rxtytr)08/07/26(Wed)20:31:19No.586[Reply]▶Replies: >>587>>597