btw
SABA PYAARI LAUT AAYI
I MISSED HER SO MUCH
ToT
She is the best parasocial relation I have Because of the fact that I know it will remain parasocial
and there is nothing more to do in that relation
I cannot pursue her
I cannot make her my friend
I cannot make my presence known to her
This is what makes it the most stable relation I have other than family
With my other relations there is always a weird sense of uncertainity and painful curiosiity