/b/ - Random

So I have a gf, we've been together for like 9-10 months and even after being together for this long sometimes i still feel like maybe we just wont work out in the end. I do love her alot, she's actually really sweet but the one thing that gets to me is how easily she gets irritated. like she'll get angry over the most stupid things sometimes and when she's pissed she talks to me rudely too, and then later its just... normal? like nothing happened. I've tried understanding her so many times, genuinely. but atp i'm just tired of trying to explain the same thing for the 100th time and hoping maybe this time she'll understand. We never really went on dates either. and no, i never expected gifts from her or anything like that, we're both young and i dont expect her to spend money on me. i dont need some expensive shit, all i wanted was effort. just make me feel like you actually wanna be with me and care about me yk? And before anyone says "did you tell her this?" yes. I DID. so many fucking times. But everytime i try to talk about something that hurt me, it somehow turns into "haan meri hi saari galti hai" "main kisi cheez mein achi nahi hu" "tum mujhse better deserve karte ho" etc etc. like bro im not even trying to attack you 😭 i'm trying to tell you what is hurting me and somehow 5 mins later i'm the one sitting there comforting you because now apparently you're sad about me being upset. and honestly i'm tired of it. I keep thinking about where it all went wrong. like what happened to the sweet girl i said yes to? the girl i actually used to love talking to all day? sometimes it feels like i'm dating a completely different person now. and the worst part is i'm starting to regret everything. not because i dont love her, i do. thats what makes it worse tbh. maybe i'm just holding onto what she used to be instead of looking at what our relationship actually is now. idk. i'm probably not gonna find some magical solution from posting this here lol, i just really needed to vent somewhere before i overthink myself into another dimension.